aug 20 2003

Love doesn't blindside you, nor overwhelm you suddenly from nowhere. It takes time to develop love, and it only grows in the cauldron of adversity, and shared values, and experience of high and low days, and giving yourself until you're empty... and being surprised by the fact that you aren't really empty.

Anything else is the roller coaster ride of infatuation... you can get on and enjoy the ride with its uphill climb and its downhill rush, but reality is that the ride ends and you have to get off... also you always have to pay for the roller coaster.

Do you want the long, slow journey of love, or another roller coaster ride? I meddle because I love you.



And I love that you guys are meddling, its cool, don't worry.

And I know this. Yes, it IS a rollercoaster ride right now, and we're enjoying it. But we both see this going beyond that. We've even discussed it. We both know that the initial infatuation will eventually pass, that things will seem less intense after time, that the acetelyne will beget halogen will beget flourescent track lighting. And we're OK with that!

How did you and Mom feel when you met each other, and your relationship progressed? Did you guys feel that same diminishing intensity? If so, there must've been SOMETHING that made you know that this was the one, right? I don't know if this is "The One", not yet, it's still too new. I just know that I am in foreign territory here, and that it's scary, but a good scary, y'know? Like seeing the Taj Mahal or Everest. I don't know the territory, and I don't know the customs, but I'm eager to learn, because it's beautiful.


* Maaaaan, I should've listened to him! I was so duped into thinking that the feeling was mutual, that it was reciprocated. What a liar. And she'll keep on lying like that until she figures herself out and deals with her baggage. Sad. But good riddance.

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